It’s wonderful, that blissful period of time right after doing laundry when pretty much every item you own is clean. So many possibilities of things that you can slap on your body at any given time! And I am always excited when I have a giant pile of clean underwear. I usually start with whatever’s new and comfortable and vaguely exciting – at the moment, my preferred underwear is a tie between a fabulous rainbow pair from Old Navy, and some polka dot pair I got half off from some department store or another (tacky is how I roll). And for the next week or so, it’s an easy progression from there. But at some point, the really good underwear runs out. I start working my way through the pairs that are a bit frayed, and the pairs that only work with some pants, but not others. After that comes the poochy underwear. At some point in the past few years, I dropped a pants sizes or two, and as a result I’ve got underwear a size bigger that they really should be. Can’t make myself throw them away, as they’re perfectly acceptable, but nonetheless they’re definitely further down the line when it comes to things that are comfortable. Then, after those are gone, comes the “stupid underwear that I bought off the discount rack that kinda fits but not really.” I pretend they fit, so I don’t feel bad having blown dollars on underwear that doesn’t fit me. And after that comes the “sexy underwear that really shouldn’t be worn except for sexy time.” You know, all good and well during sexy time, but not so much for the rest of the day. And then comes the “sexy underwear that shouldn’t even be worn during sexy time because it’s so frikking uncomfortable.” I usually don’t ever hit that point. When I’m being good about laundry, I’ll usually not get past the “size too large” stage. But I totally slid this time, slid waaay too far. All I’ve got left are bizarre chunks of fabric with strings hanging off in mysterious places, chunks of fabric that masquerade as underwear but aren’t really underwear, just torture devices for when I get lazy and don’t do laundry.

In any case, I did my laundry. It’s sitting there staring at me, wondering why I’m typing this post rather than putting it away.

8 days until Salami Day. Gotta figure out something for that. Either buy a couple tubes, and Drew & I can have a salami extravaganza, or find people that want to go out and get salami with us. Or find people who want to have a home salami celebration. I’ll get Drew to bug people at his work.

Got a fabulous pair of late-90s sorta wide leg pants from the thrift store recently, haven’t figured out if I’m gonna sew stuff to them or wear as-is. Finished sewing my ill-fitting bright blue Hostel Loki shirt, it is now a better fitting bright pink and blue shirt. Should take pictures and post them at some point. My vinyl corset’s zipper pooped out on me, got a new zipper to replace it only to realize that a.) vinyl against fabric puckers awfully and b.) I didn’t get the sort of zipper that separates at the bottom. So, need to go back to Hancock and get a new zipper, then figure out how to sew it right. If I’m feeling really ambitious, maybe I’ll do some hand-sewing. We shall seee.

I really want to sew me a petticoat. Or a tu-tu. I’ve never owned either, and that could be fun both as club clothing as well as to wear under skirts to make them floofier. I *think* they’re supposed to be easy to sew, and I’ve got a giant pile of old netting just begging for me to try it out. Skirts are usually the things least likely to get screwy for me. I’ve more or less accepted that 1/2 of all things I sew end up like crap, but the odds are a bit more in my favor for skirts.

I was going to buy a pair of shoes from JC Penney with a $10 off $25 coupon, but we played Axis & Allies for 2837489374 hours on Saturday and ended up not finishing until the mall closed, and the coupon expired that day. D’oh! What’s unfortunate is that I played America in a game where America can’t even attack anyone until the end of their 3rd round. And in a game where each round takes about 2 hours, the wait gets quite tedious, especially as this game day was held at a location that didn’t allow you to bring in any food or drink, and only sold candy bars and chips in the vending machines. Not even pretzels or granola bars! My teeth were already melting from the 24oz Dr. Pepper I had, they didn’t need any more melting! I did also play China, but they were teeny. Apparently I need to try playing one of the several 2 person A&A games Drew has, might be more satisfying.

I really need to buy a coat. My current one has tears and stains, no good at all. What I want is a fabulous London Fog trenchcoat from Macy’s, I’ve just got to fork over the $100 for it. I also want an awesome rice cooker, of the sort that you can also use to slow cook things, one that keeps your rice fresh infinitely long. Which also looks to be around $100. You know, while I’ve got this really great non-existent income flow right now, all of the sudden I want to blow my slowly dwindling savings. Oh wait, I do have some income! A few people bought Salami Day t-shirts. Not enough for me to get a check yet, but it’s progress. Google Ads have seriously slowed, which is too bad.

Anyhow, I should make myself go bike ridin’. Or Reich Biden. Toodles!

Work is still super busy. Am slowly plowing through Job #2, and Job #1 has gotten a bit easier now that I’ve more or less figured out how to use a Mac, and how to use Codeigniter, and how to use all of the other stuff they have me using. It’s been educational – I’m still not sure how much longer this job will last, but when it ends I’ll have some good stuff to spruce up my resume & portfolio with.

On a completely unrelated note, all of the tank tops at Old Navy got stupid. I really like their ribbed tank tops – they’re comfortable and usually about $5-$7 each. However, at some point recently they decided to add a foot in length to them. I don’t see the point, I wear the shirt and have a giant pile of fabric bunched around my waist? So anyhow, I lost my tank top source, and need to find another one as my tank tops are slowly fraying apart!

Cow appreciation day last weekend was successful, we hit 4 different Chick-fil-as. The best one was in Larkridge, everyone was super excited, there were balloons everywhere and the employees seemed really into the event, and lots of customers were dressed up. We got our picture taken, too. The worst was some CFA in NE Denver (Brighton?), we drove through the middle of nowhere only to find unenthusiastic staff, very few people dressed up, and a few customers that snickered at our costumes. Not appropriate!

I finally beat Oasis on Insane. Were this 2004, when the game actually came out, it would likely be much more exciting. Nonetheless, Oasis has provided me with months of gameplay, and was totally worth the $6 I paid for it. On a similar note, rumors have it that a version of Civilization will be coming to Facebook this June. Aside from my occasional Scrabble obsession (and whenever someone flings a Pathwords invite at me), I’m not a big Facebook gamer. Yoville got tedious, and I haven’t logged into my account in months now. There’s a bunch of others (Mafia Wars, Farmville, etc.) I signed up for, played once, and then promptly forgot about. I think a problem with these games is that they’re mostly about doing the same thing over and over to acquire more stuff and build your character. None of which is all that interesting to me. One thing that is immensely interesting, however, is Civilization.

Job prospects = still slow. Didn’t get the job I interviewed for this past Friday. They might have a temporary use for me for a project that may or may not happen, however, which would be nice. I’d like to get more hours at Liberty, as though the pay is meager, it’s actually pretty fun to jump around by the side of the road all day long. Also, I don’t think I’ve ever felt this healthy in the middle of winter before.

I wish another Chick-fil-a would open up out here. This is because I want to do another First 100. Preferably without the blizzard this time around. I also really just want to eat chicken constantly, because it is so freaking good.

I finished reading “Jonathan Norrell & Mr. Strange” by Susanna Clarke recently. It was fabulous, a very British early 1800′s take on magicians and magic, quite long and involving with quirky characters, I highly recommend it. I’m currently reading “Nature Girl” by Carl Hiaasen, which is quite funny.

Finished watching Evangelion. Apparently the ending was poorly executed due to budget issues, and I thus need to see a movie called “The End of Evangelion” for proper fulfillment. I really liked the concept behind the ending, and we can hopefully get our paws on the movie sometime soon. Started watching Bleach, am enjoying it but with mixed feelings. The more it veers away from the “I need to kill this giant Hollow” plots, the more I like it.

Oh yeah, I totally scored some free fabric off of Craigslist. Giant bag, some scraps and some decent-sized pieces. I’ve got a pair of black shorts with a drawstring that never really fit me right, and I’ve got this great idea to convert it into a skirt, adding some fabric to the bottom in ruffles or something. I’ve got plenty of fabric to do this, now it’s simply the matter of locating said shorts. There’s this black hole that follows me sometimes, and likes eating things I’d prefer not to have eaten. I picked up a tank top from Old Navy with the final dregs of my gift card, and as a tank top it’s entirely too long, but with some fabric on the bottom it would make an awesome dress. I need to find a fabric really similar to the tank top’a fabric to execute this, however. Now, once I have made these items, I need to find or create circumstances where I would actually wear a skirt or a dress. Pants are just such a nice default, but it’s a shame that I keep making all of this crap and never wear it anywhere for the most part.

Oh yeah, crispy chocolate in my near future. Old Towne Arvada is having some sort of chocolate festival, whereupon I will enter items into their cookie contest and, with any luck, will win a giant pile of chocolate. Which would be good timing, as our Christmas chocolate is slowly running out!

Also, thank you to whoever advised me try the Old Navy “Sweetheart” jeans. They fit and are really comfortable, despite how ridiculous their name is!

We’re pretty sure there are other grocery stores around here, thus why the Safeway here has cheaper prices. I want to find the local King Soopers. This is because “King Soopers” sounds like a completely ridiculous name for a grocery store. Also, because they’re apparently owned by Kroger, and so I’m hoping they carry the Kroger Private Selection ice cream.

Also, I have finally been in a Whole Foods. $21.00/lb tuna, eek! Lots of free samples, though. And that aisle with all of the bulk food like Elwood Thompson has is useful. I’m not too keen on going back though: waay too expensive, and waay too much conspicuous consumption. Too bad there’s not a Trader Joe’s out here. I want chocolate granola bars and $1 garlic pizza dough, dangit!

Anyhow, I’m drinking $1 discount kosher grape juice from Safeway. It’s pretty good, might have to go back and get more.

And here’s a desperate question: where does one go to find women’s jeans that *aren’t* narrow in the thigh/knee area but are also lower cut? Lower cut pants fit me so much better then regular cut, but they all seem to be of the skinny jeans and/or stretch and/or boot-cut variety. All I want is a pair of pants that fit me and doesn’t convert my thighs into sausages!

In any case, I have scrunchies in all sorts of colors, to match whatever outfit I happen to be wearing, and I look forward to wearing them for the next 50-60 years or so.

And now for something completely different: Turbo Heather!

I wish I had one when I was a kid!

salamiday.spreadshirt.com

In other news, I stimulated the economy today. Everything I got was on sale, but that’s pretty standard these days. — the power is flickering, crap. I hope I finish this before it gets bored and dies — Anyhow, I got hookups from Christine for some sweet sparkly shoes with her 40% discount from Journeys. Also got a few shirts and 4 pairs of underwear from JC Penney. Technically two pairs were free, as they had a “spend $50 get $10 off” deal going on, and I added on the extra two pairs just so I could make $50 worth of stuff. Can’t have too many pairs of underwear, though! I also finally got to spend my Michaels gift card. I love craft stores, there’s so much junk to look at that is neat. I got a set of 8″ round cake pans, which I hope to put to good use soon, as well as some red dye, so I can finish off a few shirts I managed to dye a bad salmon rather then red not too long ago.

When I left the mall, the snow was falling all around me. It was magical and glorious and took forever to get home because I and everyone else around me were barely doing 40 in the 65mph zone. Did I mention that I’m super excited by the snow?

I may have found a solution to the “where to go in a week or so?” dilemma. I’ve never been to Asheville, NC, and was thinking about going there to get some serious hiking in, as I’ve heard it’s a really neat town. I found a really cheap hostel there, I think I can manage $15 a night! Might be taking Christine with me for company, depending on what her job situation’s looking like at that point. Mind you, if the weather in a week is still like it is now, my plans may change to someplace a little further south. Then again, maybe not, hiking in snow could be pretty awesome.

Then come the clothes! So, clothes are really tricky, especially when they’re all sized with S, M, L. One brand’s S is another’s L, it’s no good at all! Anyhow, I got a tank top and squishy pants set, both size L, which based on the sizing chart seemed like they’d work. The tank top fits me perfectly. Ideally, in fact. The pants? You could fit two of me in it (well, more like 1.5 of me, but that’d be bloodier). I might try to pawn them off on my mom, or something.

I’ve recently realised that there is a conspiracy at work, here. See, according to what I’ve read on the Internets lately, there’s apparently two basic body types, ‘apple’ shapes and ‘pear’ shapes. Apple shapes gain weight around their torso, in the abdomen and chest area. Pears tend to gain weight in the hips and butt. The conspiracy is that most women’s clothing companies seem like they’re designing clothing for pear shapes. See, when I gain weight, my proportions change completely. My butt stays the same, and my gut and chest balloon out. All of which is very complicated if you want to buy pants. Meaning that when I buy pants, they’re either low-rise (to avoid the waist issue entirely) or men’s pants (to handle my beer gut).

In any case, someone desperately needs to start designing women’s clothing like men’s dress shirts are designed. Have there be separate sizings for the waist and the hips, or separate sizings for different bust sizes. Anyhow who’s not ‘average’ in the chest knows the horror of trying to find a dress that fits when they’re all designed to fit a certain set of proportions. No good at all!

Or we could all just wear sweatpants and spandex all the time. And eat donuts. Copious amounts of donuts. Sounds like a plan!